Dr. Evil: How could you, Buffy? Buffy: I am really sorry. I will never do it again. Dr. Evil: You invited these degenerate people into our lives, and now one of them has clearly over indulged in drugs and drowned in our hot tub. Buffy: I am really sorry, I feel terrible. I was lonely. … Continue reading Buffy is Sorry
Son of Sam
Son of Sam The Killer Speaks (TV Show you can see part of it on You Tube David Berkowitz notes: David Berkowitz shot the dog because it barked too much, then he decided the dog had told him to kill people, now he talks about demons caused him to do it, and is rather unassuming … Continue reading Son of Sam
Agent Cooper
According the theory of Zen, clamoring for Agent Cooper will only result in no Agent Cooper coming to us. If we agree Dougie and say, "We are perfectly fine with Dougie" then Lynch will bring back Cooper, but only if we don't say we want him. It is important to never care too much. This … Continue reading Agent Cooper
Idle Race
8/4/2017 Woodleaf: Macy if we can’t get Manson for the concert what bands can we get? Macy: We can get Idle Race. W: Idle Race, no one has ever heard of Idle Race. M: The lead singer was born in 1947. It’s hard to get people from 50 years ago, because most of them are … Continue reading Idle Race
The Strawberry Field
Woodleaf: Macy, I have decided the Strawberry Field In Asylum, California is much is a better place for the Mason Concert then inside the city of San Francisco. The witches from the bureau of bad behavior were blamed for some murders there. Its basically a field, like Woodstock. It’s a great place for a concert. … Continue reading The Strawberry Field
Castle Fluffy Clouds
In Switzerland, there is a place, that is on a very high hill called Castle Fluffy Clouds Macy made an unscheduled stop there and ended up staying over night. The castle was owned by a group of ladies. People would come and stay a few nights and pay what they could. It was a flophouse. … Continue reading Castle Fluffy Clouds
My impassioned review of Twin Peaks, The Revival
Spoilers up to Episode 10 I was the biggest Twin Peaks Fan, but after suffering through 10 episodes of Twin Peaks, The Revival, this may be the worse TV ever made in the history of TV. Watching it is like a punishment. The Show is about a guy named Dougie Jones who is "retarded" not … Continue reading My impassioned review of Twin Peaks, The Revival
He let them all go
DW: "What do you mean you let them all go? You just opened the gates of Castle Fluffy Clouds, and you let all the people out and now they are gone, and I have no friends?" DB: "Yes, they wanted to go so I let them all go, and if any remained I kicked them … Continue reading He let them all go
Inspirational Writers
Inspirational Writers My three favorite writers are P.G. Wodehouse, David Foster Wallace, and William Burroughs. All of them have had a big influence on my writing. My goal to write a post modern novel. I have been working on this novel since 2004. When I get an idea for it, I sometimes put my stories … Continue reading Inspirational Writers
Cognitive Dissonance
Woodleaf: “Cracky, I have a wonderful idea.” Cracky: “No, bad idea!” Woodleaf: “We get Charles Manson to perform for the 50th anniversary of the Summer Of Love.” Macy: “As your media rep, I have to advise you that this is bad idea.” Woodleaf: “It’s a great idea. Imagine the Cognitive Dissonance that will affect the … Continue reading Cognitive Dissonance
A Family
Macy was getting a lot of writing done without demonic interruptions G had a large family. How many dolls did they have? What were their names? In G’s infamous story “My Story”, these questions are asked. Woodleaf made up the whole thing himself. He found it difficult to write as he thought a stupid person … Continue reading A Family
Meet the Hamsters
The children of Francis and Walter Hamster who were named Tina and Herbie were still alive. Tina was a small retarded hamster, but she was the most endearing hamster. She liked to sit on shoulders, and she would climb up the space in between the dresser and wall and fall down over and over, which … Continue reading Meet the Hamsters
The boyfriend was Black Irish
John Brady was a boyfriend of Burroughs who lived with him in 1972. He had a drinking problem. When Burroughs moved to New York he basically abandoned Johnny as he was called. Burroughs wanted Brady to move to New York with him and become a police officer and self-supporting. But, Brady did not come for … Continue reading The boyfriend was Black Irish
Woodleaf shoots Apple
Woodleaf shoots an Apple 3/15/2017 Woodleaf shoots Apple off his wife's head, not his real wife Ann, but his imaginary wife he created, and then uploaded to Wikipedia. I knew he was waiting for the right time to upload her to Wikipedia. Woodleaf thinks he can do anything Burroughs did, and if he does … Continue reading Woodleaf shoots Apple
The Perfect Suicide Machine
David Woodleaf was so disappointed that when he traveled to Castle Fluffy Clouds. All the prisoners had committed suicide. He threw the dead bodies into the castle moat, where they were were eaten by the piranha fish. No bodies means no case against him, no crime has occurred. (The nerve of the Amazon reviewer who … Continue reading The Perfect Suicide Machine
Door to Door
Woodleaf goes Door to Door Doorbell Rings Old Lady answers door Woodleaf: Hello, I was wondering if you happened to be from Nueva Germania by any chance? Woodleaf: You’re are not? I am sorry to hear that. I was wondering if you would be willing to say you’re from Nueva Germania, and that you knew … Continue reading Door to Door
Trauma at Castle Fluffy Clouds
Woodleaf: Imagine my horror when I noticed the Goggle has blocked Castle Fluffy Clouds from appearing. Could it be due to that photoshopped photo of the funny little man with the fruit sticker, whom I am so obsessed with? (I always end my sentences with prepositions.) Debra Tate is obsessed with Leslie Van Houten, even … Continue reading Trauma at Castle Fluffy Clouds
The Jungle Land Song
Rehearsal on the glass enclosed sun porch in San Diego Jungle Book Land Song Woodleaf: Cue the dancing bears Walking through forests of palm tree apartments. Scoff at the monkeys who live in their dark tents. We came to the Jungle Book Land to get away from the Four Fruits But as it turned out … Continue reading The Jungle Land Song
Sun Porch
Woodleaf Here: If I had married the Aryan Heiress, what would my life be like now? No one really knows. If I had not made that incredibly bad decision in the hardware store, what could of my life been like? First of all, she does not want to called Aryan Heiress, so I am going … Continue reading Sun Porch
Fish and Wildlife
And so you see Cracky, when I uploaded “My Story” about G (as in Gee, you have a really big head) and I uploaded a video of her large, fat, square-shaped head on my website at Planet Juniper, (I had tricked a bunch of senile old people into allow me to use their name so … Continue reading Fish and Wildlife
Reward
Woodleaf: You see, Cracky, when someone like agrees to backup my imaginary projects and jokes, I reward them. I give them praise in print on my website Planet Juniper. I know that they feel this makes it worth saying and doing stupid and ridiculous things. And to think this woman invited me into her home, … Continue reading Reward
Missive
Woodleaf to Cracky, come in Cracky CK: I am here Woodleaf: Have you read my latest missive? CK: I have Woodleaf: What did you think? CK: You mean the one entitled “My Story?” Woodleaf: Yes CK: I was moved Woodleaf: Oh, thank you, Cracky. You are my best friend, ever. No one else will read … Continue reading Missive
Cracky (a poem)
Cracky was a parrot from the Amazon Rain Forest Cracky was a supportive parrot without Cracky, Woodleaf could feel all his insecurities returning as long as Cracky believed many impossible things or at least said he did Woodleaf was content
Money For Nothing
Woodleaf was doing Mason Family Tours Interviewer: Let us see, Woodleaf You have a lot of websites and blogs with domain names, as follows:( Woodleaf dot com Planet Juniper (where things get really weird) dot net Heidi Manyhats dot com Castle Fluffy Clouds dot com John Money for Nothing Band Camp Sonia Nevermore’s Fake Event … Continue reading Money For Nothing
The Four Seasons Newsletter
The Four Seasons Quarterly Newsletter is a newsletter which keeps interested readers informed on all things Woodleaf in nature. As the name implies, it is published four times a year. Spring, Summer, Fall and Winter. The newletter keep people informed on all the seasonal events at Castle Fluffy Clouds. Castle Fluffy Clouds is located high … Continue reading The Four Seasons Newsletter
Review of the Mr. Robot Book
ROBOT: Red Wheelbarrow: by Sam Esmail and Courtney Looney A book companion to the Mr. Robot TV series Background Info (minor spoilers will not give away the plot, keep reading if you want) Spoilers: Who is Mr. Robot? Mr. Robot is a hallucination of Elliot’s dead father. Elliot loses time and becomes Mr. … Continue reading Review of the Mr. Robot Book
Chicken moves to The Castle
When Dr. Evil returns home from the Virgin Mega Store, Buffy is not there. He calls her cell, and there is no answer. Maybe one of my enemies, like Bob Nelson, has kidnapped her, thinks Dr. Evil, and he begins to panic. This is how it happens when someone disappears on television. At first the … Continue reading Chicken moves to The Castle
Buffy Goes Shopping
Buffy drives her cute little sports car to the Stonestown Galleria, and parks in the underground garage. She goes up in the to the top level heading toward Nordstrom’s. She notices a horrible smell coming from a store called Bath and Body Works. The blonde, Aryan, Pixie like, model is larger then life, and nude, … Continue reading Buffy Goes Shopping
Bee Girl is aging in Prison
While Bee Girl rots away in prison, Chess Master is content to stay in the house, playing chess with himself, surfing the internet, and talking to his magic chess set. He is pleased that Little Bear is now speaking to him again. He likes Little Bear better then the other chess pieces, because Little Bear … Continue reading Bee Girl is aging in Prison
Animatrons at De Young Museum
Bee Girl at the Opening of the New De Young Museum in 2005 And now we bring you the continuing story of Chess Master and Bee Girl. As we left off on the last chapter, Bee Girl, told Chess Master she loved him, and all he had to do was think of a way to … Continue reading Animatrons at De Young Museum
