Missive

Woodleaf to Cracky, come in Cracky

CK: I am here

Woodleaf: Have you read my latest missive?

CK: I have

Woodleaf: What did you think?

CK: You mean the one entitled “My Story?”

Woodleaf: Yes

CK: I was moved

Woodleaf: Oh, thank you Cracky, you are my best friend ever, no one else will read my missives.  If  do read them they are left strangely speechless and unable to provide me with constructive feedback.

CK: Macy sent a cable. The cable said, legal won’t allow us to print the story. Can you promise me there will not be any problems down the road if we use her real name?

Woodleaf: Don’t worry the fat headed woman is too stupid to get a clue about what is going on. But, what do you suggest?

CK: Macy is your PR, and I am just a parrot, who repeats back everything you say and adds the words, “I was moved.” I think you are completly right, as usually.

Woodleaf: That is right! I never listen to Macy, in fact, I do just the opposite of everything she tells me, because I think it’s funny.

CK: I am sure we won’t be sued, and that lawsuit won’t effect the status of our brilliant novel that we are coauthoring.

Woodleaf: What does this mean? Facebook said her youngest daughter is now in a relationship with Jesus Exchange. She was the one whom I wanted to marry to you, as I put in our book.

(Lauren has read the book, but it’s out of print. Lauren retains a rare copy of the book.)

CK: The Jesus Exchange means girls are married to Jesus, and not to any mortal men. It’s like nuns.

Woodleaf: Cracky, you are brilliant.

CK: You are too kind.

 

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